Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Pot of Gold

My friend J posted a piece she called a Pot of Gold. We met in Des Moines and have girls of similar age. Even though we live miles and miles and an ocean away from each other, it's still fun to share our life experiences through the Blogs and occasional phone calls.

She had a sweet moment with her oldest daughter this week - her Pot of Gold. So I was prompted to share mine.

I'm constantly amazed at how different my girls can be - and have been since birth. Rachel loves the physical confirmation, Kendra doesn't need it as much (although she is a hugging and sweet girl). I laugh because I'm usually trying to tug myself away from Rachel, who clings like a monkey as long as possible, and I hold on to Kendra, who flits and offers her loves like a hummingbird.

The other night, Rachel was having a hard time getting to sleep. It was about 10:45 and she had already been in tears (anyone who's been around us much knows that Rachel turns into a pumpkin sometime around 9:30pm). I went to her room again to massage her head and neck(she loves that!) to try and relax her. Then she said "just hold my hand mommy, that always helps me fall asleep."

I had tears in my eyes. And I sat for a little while before I gave her a kiss and left her to fall asleep.

I used to be soooooo frustrated when she was a baby. She liked to either fall asleep in my/our arms OR we'd stand/sit there by the crib holding her hand until she went to sleep - sometimes 20 - 30 minutes. I know, I know - don't let them train you to these habits. Well, we all have our weaknesses and having her cry and not sleep was one of mine.

We outgrew this habit after she moved out of the crib when Kendra arrived. But she always wants us to linger with her and when she prays at bedtime, she always holds my hand.

The other night was the first time she ever vocalised the inherent need she has for the hand holding/physical comfort. A while back I started "The Five Love Languages of Children (Chapman)," I recognized immediately what her love language was, physical affirmation.

As I sat the other night, I realized how I'm no longer frustrated by this need. Someday, she won't be at home to have me hold her hand. So, I will treasure each time we have to share her love language.

But I'm still thankful I don't have to stand by a crib for 20 - 30 minutes a night now!!!!!


Hi! It's me, Julie! said...

That made me get tears in my eyes, too! I called these moments "pots of gold" moments because I'm reminded by Mary in Luke 2 to treasure these mothering moments up in my heart, so thus, pots of gold! : )

Maybe you will have to get her a soft glove and stuff it so when she leaves for college she can still have a hand to hold - joking, of course....but it is nice to know there is something about our presence that they ENJOY and maybe even NEED! : )

You are a great mom, one who is interested in her girl's love languages and needs....I love that about you, Susan! And so many other things, too!

Thanks for sharing your pot of gold!

Makila said...

I love the love languages. I need to read the one about kids. Though, poor Ben, I really think all 5 of the languages are mine! ha ha.

Just like Julie, I got tears in my eyes. Have you ever read The Kissing Hand book? It reminds me of this. It's about a little raccoon who is going to school for the first time and his mom kisses his hand so he will always have her with him. There is another one similar too. :)